What’s my WHY


My why … here… is to simply get healthier. Yes I joined here and was blogging and thinking and reading all about getting sober. But in the end, it was honestly making me crazier … Where I want to be tomorrow is a person who is focused on health – eating well, exercising and living a balanced life.

When I think about my motivation for doing this – ‘NOT drinking alcohol’ is simply a side effect of reaching for the goal of becoming healthier. I know some have deeper issues and I debated that in my own head for ages but again – it took away from the things I really needed to focus on – and as with many other aspects of my life – I’ve learned that you attract what you focus on and I choose HEALTH – I choose getting my next fix through a good workout, or planning a new outing, trip, or activity. I plan on LIVING!!

I got sucked into this world and was hungrily reading every blog post I could, and don’t get me wrong, I have great respect for the sober blogging world… for me though – I just needed to step back in order to focus my attention on other things that were more in line with where I want my life to go.

Alcohol is very much a part of our culture and will always be around – like many other ‘bad habits’ that surround us (cigarettes, gambling, etc)… they are addictions… and I admittedly have an addictive personality and so I’m shifting it now to all things health – coaching/training, strength training, dancing, meditation, self-help books, relationship books, body image… Alcohol was a side effect of me not being happy with my SELF and so that’s the area I’m working on. I drank out of loneliness and boredom and so now I’ve gone out and thrown myself back into the dating world… I’m taking new classes and trying new things… I’m stepping out of my comfort zone and the high I am getting from it all – well you can’t get that by just sitting around thinking about drinking all the time.

So my friends… I’ll keep popping in here every now and again… but see me anytime over at SparkPeople as I blog daily there… check out today’s blog about What is YOUR Motivation?

Cutting Down the Booze Team

Cutting Down the Booze Team

I’m not sure if you can access the link without being a member but we’d love to have you join our team!! SparkPeople is a wonderful website that is absolutely FREE… As you shift your focus to becoming healthier, this site provides tools and resources to get you on the right path. I have been a member for almost 8 years and have been leading this team Cutting Down the Booze for a number of years. It’s a place to go – where there are not judgements, rules, only acceptance and support for wherever YOU are at with your goals around alcohol.

Shift Happens…


Sometimes in order to regain control over something, you need to shift your attention to something else. This is what I believe to be key for me in my journey to continual growth and self-improvement. My focus has shifted from alcohol to simply wanting more out of life. 

There are some great resources here in the sober blogging world, and some who also provide extras that you can buy into… but that’s not for me. For me – it’s about the gift of giving freely without any expectations to get something back. A prime example of this is a team I have been co-leading for a number of years through SparkPeople – called Cutting Down the Booze (Calories!!). The team started out small enough and today stands with almost 800 members. The team thrives on everyone giving their advice, sharing their experiences, challenges and victories. 

It’s ever changing and all accepting. There are no conditions to make it 100 days AF without a drop. YOU decide what YOU want to achieve and we’ll be there to support you. Many of us did wander over here and some have successfully completed the 100 Day Challenge but it left many with feelings of failure (me included). I did not make it – but yet, here I am today and doing better than ever.

The measure of our success is unique to all. Some have to quit completely and can not or choose not to have booze as part of their lives. Me – well I know I will never be 100% AF – but I do know that my focus has changed. 



I am making 2014 the year where I am no longer controlled by a substance – but shifting to matters of substance, like dancing, healthy eating and exercising and cleansing. There’s no room in my head for ‘da booze thinking. I’m too busy LIVING life!!

So follow your gutt. Trust your instincts and DO what is right for you – however that may look! Have a fabulous Sunday!


Feeling on Fire!

I thought I’d come by to provide an update since my last post about my new direction for 2014 – and focusing on self-care.

I have been attending Zumba classes for 5 weeks. I will be attending my 5th week of the women’s group I spoke of in the previous blog and through this have made some amazing connections, including attending some private counseling/coaching sessions with Sue McGarvie (clinical sex therapist who is the leader of our women’s group and host for tonight’s outing that I’m attending). First – about the group… it’s an opportunity for sharing with other women about our struggles. One woman is a recovered alcoholic, others have marital issues, relationship issues, sex issues, and we all have a common goal of improving our lives. The topics covered have been amazing and the guest speaker we had last Saturday – well amazing! Mother of 3, lost 75lbs and went on to win a bodybuilding competition and now coaches and offers personal training… I signed up for 3 months with her.

The Jazzercize/franchise thing is on hold – but because I shared this in the group, one woman spoke of a local group that I might be interested in joining. Well I attended last night for the first of 4 classes (and I already know I’m signing up for more) – amazing!! The class offers a grounding exercise to start with positive affirmations, a power walk together as a group to feel sexy and bond (total fun sexy walk/trot), then we learn a dance routine which at week 4 we will perform on video for our own group on FB. It’s definitely taking me out of my comfort zone but it’s great! It’s a buzz – a high – unlike anything booze could give me (well actually I know booze can’t give me the feeling THIS does). No negative self talk is allowed in the class and it’s just a very warm and supportive group. She provides writing exercises and the dance routine on video for us to practice as well until next Monday.

Now my financial stress has been alleviated and is allowing me to do all of this of course and I’m so grateful. With my income tax return – my gf and I have decided to go back to Barbados – a very impromptu thing as I didn’t think I’d be able to travel this year since I used up all my holidays with the drama stuff with my daughter last year. We’re going in May – when I have vacation time again and things at home – they are settled enough for me to be able to do this!!

Another gf who’s daughter was diagnosed with leukemia – we’ve been spending a lot of time together – going to Zumba (I motivated her to come out) and we’ll be doing Jazzercise at my place tomorrow night. I also watched their girl while they had a date night… well her hubby got free tickets to the Elton John concert this Thursday and he’s not a music guy so he suggested she take me with her – so AWESOME!!

Work is going incredibly well! I had a raving performance appraisal! I was successful in re-certification for my professional status for another five years as a Certified Administrative Professional in Organizational Management and my supervisor will approve my goal to add to this certification as Technology Applications Specialist.

And last but not least – I’m back in the dating world. Thanks to Sue who wrote up a ‘racy’ ad – I’m having fun with this and meeting new people and going out on dates – something I have not done in ages!

Life is amazing and you know what… it happened as soon as I stopped focusing on to drink or not to drink and just simply started going after what I wanted and thinking about that more. The law of attraction works.

I will never be 100% AF – but I will be living a full, healthy and passionate life, not numbed out by too much booze.

I am getting out of the house more. I am taking classes and learning new things, getting out of my comfort zone. The appeal to sit and drink instead – NO COMPARISON!! The passion and excitement I feel when I get out there and finally do so many of the things I used to sit around thinking about…

I know this is a personal journey and for some it means complete abstinence, but I think I have found my path and incredibly happy and grateful!